Proud to be an American

but not in that 'rah rah, my country right or wrong' sort of way.

i have been reflecting on this as Barack freaking Obama wins the election and suddenly we feel poised for an extraordinary moment in history. i'm reading a lot of things online where people say they are finally proud to be an American.

I've always been proud to be an American. Honestly. i have very often been very unhappy with our government, or the overwhelming fear and hatred of others i feel reflected in the media. but i believe in America- in our right to vote and choose our leaders, freedom of press, freedom to criticize our goverment and all that.

2000 was scary, but... understandable. sorta. after all, in 2000, we didn't really understand the full depth of Bush's stupidity.

2004 was terrifying, and made me despair of the country. but i was still proud to be an American. after all, at least 50% or so of us were reasonable enough to vote for Kerry. it wasn't the mandate that Bush said it was. (suck on THIS political capital, idiot.)

in the last several months, i have been afraid to hope. even as i voted for Hillary in the primaries (and STILL have a sign in my window) even as i then, slowly, but surely, became more and more enthralled with Obama's message of hope and optimism. (can't tell you where or when it happened, but it did. i am all about the hairball of hope!) even as i read articles and polls that all agreed that Obama could win this thing.

even then, i was afraid to hope. it wasn't until Obama won Ohio last night that i started to cry and said 'he's going to win'. the politics of fear did not win this time. i feared the fear and racism that might make this country pass up the opportunity to elect a transformative president.

but America came through. is the popular vote overwhelmingly Obama? no. is this the end of racism? no. but i'm feeling truly hopeful about America again.

and just to make this about the streets of philadelphia:

and since i didn't blog last week- PHILLIES RULE! SUCK IT, TAMPA.

I don't like Mondays

On Monday, i missed my stop on the subway. i was putting my iPhone away, looked up and said 'huh. that was spring garden.' i got off at the next stop, and had a brief moment of panic when i couldn't cross over to the southbound side, then went up to the street and realized it was a five minute walk. which made me exactly five minutes late to work.

how many times have i taken the subway to work? and i missed it? i blame the fact that i am sick, and i was feeling discombobulated. (is that a real word? i mis-spelled it either way.) i had on layers, because it's cold outside, but i've got a fever, so i was hot, yet cold, and i can't figure out where to keep things when i'm wearing a coat- it's just that change of seasons/clothes thing where i can't remember which pocket i have my subway token in. and i have a new bag and i'm trying to figure out where everything goes.

so that's the kind of week i'm having!

one of those days

it has been one of those days. monday is my late day, because i stay until 6 to cover the phones. (don't even get me started on why that is.) i don't normally take advantage of it, because i have stuff to do, but i tried to get out of bed and Carter (Sheri's cat), jumped on my chest and curled up and purred. normally, he only does this to Sheri. but she's out of town, and he is a whore, and any chest will do. so i decided to lie there and read for a bit and cuddle with the cat that doesn't usually cuddle with me.

of course, i ended up lying in bed far too long, so i had to rush to get here by 10. then i couldn't find anything to wear, and i had a debate with myself over walking to work vs. packing lunch and which is better for me- i went with packing my lunch. i know i should do both, and have been better about doing both in the last week or so, but i didn't have time for both today. did i mention i didn't have to be here until TEN? and somehow i was still sacrificing walking into work. which only takes about five or ten minutes longer than taking the subway, depending on how long i have to wait for a train.

then i got here and it's taken me an hour to read 40 emails. most of which i already read this weekend because i get email on my iPhone. i just got up to get things off the printer, and realized i already did that ten minutes ago. sigh. i think it's better when i just come in to work at my normal time, instead of being all scattered and weird.

get again, i think i get an award for most boring post ever!

new school year

it's that point in the new school year where i look around and go 'i have nothing to do'. this is because now i have a reasonable amount of work to do as opposed to an insane amount of work to do, which is my workload from april until september. this is the week after the first payroll closes, and before we level, which is a school district term for looking at how many kids actually showed up as compared to our projections, and we tweak the budgets a little and move around a couple dozen teachers. next week will be levelling, and the attendant wailing and crying and nashing of teeth. then that will be over in early october and then i settle into getting ready for next april.

my life is very predictable.

to tie this to what i see on my walks to work, and still make it about the new school year, there is a charter school right next to my subway stop. as i work for the public schools, i have a chip on my shoulder about charters. i think they drain our resources. but, this one has the best principal this year. every morning, she stands outside the door and starts yelling as she sees kids walking down from the subway stop. 'ms. carter, you're late! mr. thomas, it is past 8:30 already, hurry it up!'

it seems to be working, because every day there have been fewer kids getting off the 8:30 subway. today i noticed a kid walk past the door, looking gulitily inside, as he tucked his shirt in. evidently shirts must be tucked in and he was wearing his outside his baggy pants to look cool on the subway ride.

maybe one of these days i'll actually post some pictures on this blog. i have a fabulous iPhone now, and i love to take pictures of random things. i went from having a pay-as-you-go cell phone that usually just sat on the kitchen table to not being able to have my iPhone out of sight or i get twitchy.

green?

why is the fountain at Love Park green? it's been green all week, and i have no idea why. they sometimes dye the fountain different colors- all of them crazy bright- for different occasions. pink for Breast Cancer Awareness month. team colors if one of the sports teams is in the playoffs or something. but green is the Eagles, and they're not playing now. when i walked by this morning, tables were set up, and there were people scurrying around, but i didn't see any signs that would explain why the fountain is green, and these are things i need to know.

this would be a more interesting post if i had a digital camera, and therefore a picture of the bright green fountain. i need to invest in one of those. i do so often see things walking too and from work that need to be immortalized. or at least blogged about.

speaking of green, it's finally freaking spring here, and i know that is true because the fruit trucks are back. woo hoo! smoothies! there are a few fruit trucks in philly that are out year round, but most of them are seasonal, just popping up when fruit is in season and cheap. the trials of living in the northeast.

and, as usual, another terribly exciting post from me. i think i felt the need to say something because sheri is on a work trip, and i've been living alone for the last couple of days. which is fine, and i enjoy having the house to myself, but i become pretty solitary when she's not around. i don't have any close friends at work, and i don't generally see my friends much during the week, since none of them are in philly, and we're all busy with stuff. so i'm speaking into the void a bit, to see if i can hear my voice.

of course, i didn't go on the trip with sheri, which was to miami, because i should have just been starting my busiest time of year at work. note i said *should*. because i haven't recieved a single budget, and by now i should have at least half. we'll still meet the deadline of getting the last budget into our office by next week, but we'll also be getting the first budget then, too. of course, if i had gone to miami, all the budgets would have been in my office by now, and i would have been hated by my co-workers.

cuteness

i have been completely unable to walk into work lately. i oversleep, or its too damn cold (yes, in April- i am really ready for spring to come and to stay- today is reasonable, but it's supposed to be cold again by the weekend) or i'm just too damn lazy.

but, today, as i was walking to the subway, i passed the house on the end of the block that has the three adorable children. i know the kids enough to say 'hi' in the morning, and i've had chats with the parents. i noticed as i was walking up that all of the doors to their van were open, and i figured they were just getting the kids into it for school.

the younger boy (i think he's 5 or 6) came out of the house and looked up at me and said 'we're packing to go to new york!'

'you are?' i said.

'we're going to new york and we're going to see the statue of liberty!' he proclaimed, so excited he was nearly vibrating. i feel for his parents on the drive.

'that's so nice,' i said. 'have a great time!'

'thanks,' he replied, going back into the house.

not only are these kids adorable, they're polite. and they get excited about things like the statue of liberty.

i feel for the parents because this weekend we went to nyc with my four-year-old niece to see 'the little mermaid'. the entire drive, and then lunch, was puncuated with 'it is time for ariel yet?' which was pretty cute.

and, yes, she had a great time, altho she did tell us that she did not like the part where ariel lost her tail. because ariel should have her tail all the time. i would like to perhaps turn that into a feminist lesson that ariel should not have given up her voice to get the guy, but... i doubt the niece cares about that. she just thought it was cool that ariel had a tail. and roller skates. that's how they do the underwater stuff on stage- everyone was in skates. sounds a little dorky, but it worked.

one more cuteness thing- or pretty, i guess. when i take the subway, i walk down a block that is houses on one side and a parking garage on the other. but one of the people on the block, i hear, has taken over the strip of ground behind the parking garage and planted the most amazing garden. i don't get to pass that block if i walk all the way to work- well, i guess i could, but it would require some rerouting. anyhow, even tho it has been a stupidly cold spring so far, every day, something else is blooming in that garden. today it was yellow tulips. dozens of them. it was very pretty.

movies

my LA friends who read this will be unimpressed, but there's a movie being filmed on my old block (the south street apt, for those who remember it). yesterday i walked by and noticed a storefront with a sign that said 'straighten up, chiropractic services' (only they spelled it right). i started to think 'hey, i need a chiropractor!', then i realized it was a movie set. like, i could see all the movie stuff in the middle of the street- but they weren't filming in the middle of the street, they were filming in the store.

today i walked by and it is AMAZING how many people and cameras they have crammed into that store. i don't know how they can move. it's also pouring outside, and they've got the huge bright lights shining in to make it look sunny outside.

now, maybe my LA friends can tell me how i can find out *what* movie this might be. yes, i could ask someone from the crew, but they do not invite conversation. it's still philly.