Proud to be an American

but not in that 'rah rah, my country right or wrong' sort of way.

i have been reflecting on this as Barack freaking Obama wins the election and suddenly we feel poised for an extraordinary moment in history. i'm reading a lot of things online where people say they are finally proud to be an American.

I've always been proud to be an American. Honestly. i have very often been very unhappy with our government, or the overwhelming fear and hatred of others i feel reflected in the media. but i believe in America- in our right to vote and choose our leaders, freedom of press, freedom to criticize our goverment and all that.

2000 was scary, but... understandable. sorta. after all, in 2000, we didn't really understand the full depth of Bush's stupidity.

2004 was terrifying, and made me despair of the country. but i was still proud to be an American. after all, at least 50% or so of us were reasonable enough to vote for Kerry. it wasn't the mandate that Bush said it was. (suck on THIS political capital, idiot.)

in the last several months, i have been afraid to hope. even as i voted for Hillary in the primaries (and STILL have a sign in my window) even as i then, slowly, but surely, became more and more enthralled with Obama's message of hope and optimism. (can't tell you where or when it happened, but it did. i am all about the hairball of hope!) even as i read articles and polls that all agreed that Obama could win this thing.

even then, i was afraid to hope. it wasn't until Obama won Ohio last night that i started to cry and said 'he's going to win'. the politics of fear did not win this time. i feared the fear and racism that might make this country pass up the opportunity to elect a transformative president.

but America came through. is the popular vote overwhelmingly Obama? no. is this the end of racism? no. but i'm feeling truly hopeful about America again.

and just to make this about the streets of philadelphia:

and since i didn't blog last week- PHILLIES RULE! SUCK IT, TAMPA.